Monday, April 2, 2007

"I'm So Beautiful...I'm Wet" - Eva

Hot Slut of the Day!

Helen Mirren

For Kevin

posted by Michael K Permalink
Birthday Sluts

Angela Lansbury (81)
John Mayer (29)
Kellie Martin (31)
Flea (44)
Tim Robbins (48)
Suzanne Somers (60)

A special Birthday greeting to Kevin!

posted by Michael K Permalink
Sunday, October 15, 2006
"I'm So Beautiful...I'm Wet" - Eva

You know she's looking at that cheap ass poster and thinking to herself, "Hi, pretty lady. Glad you could make it."

Anyway, Eva LongWHORIA is at Pure in Las Vegas (where she belongs) hosting some stupid night. I'm guessing the proceeds went to Eva's favorite charity, herself. Homegirl needs it, cause that hair is looking beat.

Eva came directly from Paris where she was trying to fix her relationship with Tony Parker. Apparently, it worked and the two are better than ever. Poor Tony tried to get away from that trash.

Her spokeswhore confirmed the two were chained back together, "There is a genuine love there. They are trying to work things out."


Bindi Irwin is Taking Her Father's Place

Bindi Irwin is Taking Her Father's Place

When Steve Irwin was killed, the world quickly adopted Bindi Irwin as their own. Her apperance at his memorial helped launch her into stardom. Things work quickly, because Bindi is already shooting her own special for Discovery Kids. The show which will air in January 2007 is called, Bindi, The Jungle Girl.

She said, "I'm trying to get across the message that don't be afraid of animals, they're just put on this earth to help the environment and everything like that."

The 26-episode show will also feature her father in scenes that were filmed before his death.

The little girl isn't afraid of animals at all even though her father was killed byone.

"Some people think that I would be afraid of them, but I'm never ever afraid of an animal. I just get excited and some that are dangerous I just think, 'Oooh! What's going to happen?' and things like that."

Hey, if you can get famous off of your father's death, why not? She should re-think the hair though. Other than that, she's adorable.


posted by Michael K Permalink
Leave the Hag Alone!

Madonna wants nothing more than to adopt an African baby so she looks better and feels better about herself. There's nothing wrong with that. Now, there's some child protection group that is trying to stop her from doing so.

A Malawian children's group named, The Eye of the Child, is challenging her ass in court from adopting 13-month old, David Banda.

The group said, "We are concerned that the High Court has taken a short cut and waived the law. We are registering our concern and will seek clarification from the court, after which we will decide what action to take."

Madonna's rep confirms the adoption, but she has left Africa for London without the baby.

However, this morning one of Madonna's bodyguards was seen boarding a plane in Africa with a baby.

What is wrong with these people? I'm sure she can give this kid a better life than he already has. Yes, he will probably grow up resentful and a drug addict, but at least he'll be wearing hot clothes while doing so!


Jessica Alba is pretty hot

ew York is The Flavorette

New York will announce on The Flavor of Love reunion show that she is filming The Flavorette. The show is wrapping up now and will most likely debut next Spring.

Tiffany Patterson, age 24 (laughable, right) said,

“These men are worse than the women who were on season one and season two [of ‘Flavor of Love’]. This show is so chaotic, it’s overboard, it’s over-the-top, it’s extreme and these guys know they’re fighting for a wonderful woman so they’ve been at each other’s throats and I’m flattered by it. I can’t complain.” But that’s okay with her; she tells the paper, “I like it when the guys go at each other. I’m a prize, I’m so worth it — frankly, it turns me on.”

Also, a Dlisted reader e-mailed me and claimed that New York's appearance on Flavor of Love 2 was completely fake. I'm not surprised.

"Flava Flav already knew early on who he kind of wanted. The producers and Flav decided that New York should come back and make it to the final 2 and create this huge scene. They wanted to bring her back, because of her popularity. They also wanted to use her 'broken heart' as a reason for her own reality show. Everything New York did on the show was fake and producers told her what to say and how to say it. They wanted her to push Delishis into the pool at the end, but she declined"


posted by Michael K Permalink
Jessica Alba is Too Sexy for Jesus

The Alba asking Jesus why he made her so hot on the set of The Fantastic Four 2 on 10/12

We all can agree that Jessica Alba is pretty hot, but homegirl won't stop talking about how hard it is being sexy. Eva LongWhoria anyone? She said that she originally became a Christian, because the Latin American community rejected her due to her looks.

She now has left Christians, because she kept getting hit on.

She told Elle, "Older men would hit on me and my youth pastor said it was because I was wearing provocative clothing, when I wasn't.

"It just made me feel, like, if I was in anyway desirable to the opposite sex, that it was my fault, and it made me ashamed of my body and of being a woman."

Yeah, it's really hard being drop-dead hot. She shouldn't downplay her sex appeal, because that's what is getting her jobs. It isn't her acting chops that's for sure.

Eva LongWHORIA spent some quality time her man

Eva LongWHORIA spent some quality time her man, Tony Parker's, mom in Paris yesterday. My eyes don't know where to rest. I look up and see two nasty-ass faces and I look down I see two fugly fug purses.

I would normally think it smart for Eva to pose next to someone so fug, to make herself look hotter. In this case, Tony mom's ugly brings out Eva's hardcore and true fug. It's like when the sunlight hits a leaf and you can see the gold in it.

Thx Brenda

posted by Michael K Permalink
Guess the Ho?

UPDATE - Click here to see the ho behind the smile. Congrats to an anonymous bitch who won this!

posted by Michael K Permalink
The Real World #89

The Real World: Denver is premiering soon and here's a video showing the highlights of the season. Basically, they could've compiled clips from any season and it would've been the same shit. Does anybody even watch this show anymore?

The casting department at MTV really needs to take a look at the situation. They always cast the same kind of gay, the same kind of black guy, the same kind of emotional slut. The cast members usually just get drunk and cry then fight and then screw each other.

I'll pass, because I can watch this same kind of behavior on Cheaters.

UPDATE - The video isn't showing up for some of you. Here's a link to it!

Thx Nicmak

posted by Michael K Permalink
Britney's Back

*images removed by request, but I'm sure you can find em!"

Just weeks after giving birth to SPF2, a skinnier Britney Spears showed herself in Malibu. Wearing an argyle sweater and truly fug sunglasses she made her way to Planet Blue escorted by a new bodyguard.

Homegirl got a makeover and by makeover I mean full lipo and a tummy tuck. I miss the platform flip flops and hot pink gypsy skirts! Let's hope this is just a one-time show and the old, elegant Britney will come back. I mean she's not even holding a Starbucks!

Where's the real Brit?

A Whole New World from Aladdin is a special song for Peter Andre and Jordan.

KFed is a BonafideTube Star!

First CSI and now this crap. KFed made an appearance on last night's WWE and got his stupid ass fake kicked by John Cena. This is so damn cliche. He's in his element though. I only wish that they would've kicked his stupid ass for real.

The stunt was to promote his album, Playing with Fire, which hits stores on Halloween. He was booed by fans before being delivered his fake beatdown. It will air on the USA Network tonight.

I'm sure the YouTube will be up any second now.


posted by Michael K Permalink
A Whole New Set of Ear Drums

A Whole New World from Aladdin is a special song for Peter Andre and Jordan. The pair sang it at their wedding and also performed it at a charity event a year ago. At that event they smartly lip-synced it.

Well, a newer version has been leaked. Apparently, the new version doesn't have any kind of effects. Peter Andre sounds fine, but Jordan sounds like her breast implants are popping while she's singing it. In her book, Jordan talks about how she thinks she has a nice enough voice. Looks like she needs to get those ears checked.

She's still the hotness though. Harvey really should've sang her part instead.

Click here to listen to it

Thx to all who sent it to me!

posted by Michael K Permalink
The CAPTION THIS CONTEST Winner for October 16th!!!

You wouldn't know it by looking at me, but I am cooking a pot roast between my thighs. - Ted


Forget what you heard about New York---Krazy's Granny is the new Flavorette!!!!!!!!! - bz

I was going to jump out of a cake for your birthday...but I ate it. - Boogie

If you gave her a dirty Sanchez she'll probably make it into a sandwich for later! - El Bastardo

posted by Michael K Permalink
Hot Slut of the Day!

Josie Bissett

posted by Michael K Permalink
Birthday Sluts

Eminem (34)
Wyclef Jean (34)
Chris Kirkpatrick (35)
Ziggy Marley (38)
Norm MacDonald (43)
Rob Marshall (46)
Alan Jackson (48)
Margot Kidder (58)
George Wendt (58)

posted by Michael K Permalink
Monday, October 16, 2006
Which Davis Brother Would You Hit?

Brandon at a Teen Vogue party on 9/21 or Jason at L.A. Fashion week on 10/15

posted by Michael K Permalink
Her Breasts Will Do the Singing

Move Over Zahara, There's a New African Baby in Town

Move Over Zahara, There's a New African Baby in Town

David Banda is the 13-month-old baby boy that Madge is in the process of adopting. He recently made his way to her London home where he's staying now while the legalities of the adoption are being worked out.

Madge said, 'It's so worth it. He's just the best baby ever. Guy and I have never been happier.'

David will join Madge's other children, Rocco and Lourdes.

Apparently, she isn't stopping there and already has her eye on a little girl from the same village as David.

She said, "I looked at this child with questioning dark eyes and the saddest smile. I thought, 'She looks just like me.' I told Guy, 'We must give this child a home, too.'"

Somebody get this kid a therapist and some Valium. We should start him early, because his childhood isn't going to be easy. Better yet, get him some morphine.


posted by Michael K Permalink
TomKat's November 23rd Wedding?

Katie Holmes has already said she has the dress and now the place may be George Clooney's villa in Lake Como, Italy. This was the exact place where Brangelina were rumored to be getting married as well. Sources say that the date is November 23rd. Katie was spotted there recently after her trip to Paris with Posh Beckham.

A source said, "“The wedding is scheduled for mid-November. Kate had looked at various hotels [in the area] but the venue is to be George'’s villa."

It is also rumored that Posh will be her maid of honor.

The ceremony will be a civil service and not involve any kind of religion.

Katie was recently seen looking much slimmer as she got into the back of a hearse. Well, being married to Tom Cruise is probably like being buried alive anyway.


Paris and Blohan rub STDs again - IDLYITW

MK is keeping her shit to herself - Mollygood

Dannie Minogue gets sloshed - Egotastic!

Posh is really talented and smart - Hollywood Tuna

Vivica Fox and her forehead for days - Concrete Loop

CBGB's says goodnight - Cityrag

Paris and Blohan rub STDs again - IDLYITW

Zahara gets some rickshaw action - Just Jared

Denise and Charlie get together - Popsugar

Ellen Barking has effed the Clooney - A Socialite's Life

Naked Sundays for Xtina - Hollywood Rag

Note to Wesley Snipes: Don't drop the soap in jail - TMZ

posted by Michael K Permalink
The Amazing Race All-Stars is Coming!

CBS is doing what they should've done for Amazing Race 10 and is shooting an All-Stars version for their 11th season. TVGasm is reporting that everything is set for the new season and the teams have been selected and they have signed on the dotted line. Shooting begins next month.

Apparently, the only two teams pretty much confirmed are Colin and Christie and the most popular and famous AR couple ever, Mirna and Schmirna. There are rumors as to the other teams, but these two seem concrete.

How could they not do an all-stars without Mirna and Schmirna? This two were the hottest of the hot. Remember when Charla was forced to carry that huge slab of meat by Mirna? I mean, it can't get any better than that.

Here are some other teams I hope they include:

Team Jesus
David & Margaretta
Oswald & Danny
Teri & Ian
Don & Mary Jean
Adam & Rebecca
Jonathan & Victoria
Lori & Bolo
Meredith & Gretchen
Megan & Heidi
Lisa & Joni
Lyn & Karlyn
David & Mary

Also, in the current season of Amazing Race two of the final three teams have been leaked. Apparently, they were spotted in the city before the final city. These two teams are:

These bitches
These Bitches

posted by Michael K Permalink
Look Who's on the Cover of Elle!

Jordan aka Katie Price graces November's cover of Elle Magazine UK. This bitch is moving up in the World. Last week, Jordan sat front row at the Christian Dior show next to Mario Testino.

I'm so proud! Where's Harvey's cover though?

Thx Albz

posted by Michael K Permalink
Tweedle Dog and Tweedle Fug

Fergie and Asshole Simpson met up last night in London for dinner at Mr. Chow's. Asshole is currently performing in Chicago and Fergie is there to fix her meth face. Actually, she's there to promote her album.

The two looked like fug twins as they strolled into the eatery causing hundreds of diners to head for the door after losing their appetites.


posted by Michael K Permalink
The "Who Cares?" News!!

Is an all-smoking airline in the works? That shit better be free.

The world will be seeing more of Calista Flockhart's pulled face as Brothers and Sisters gets a full season.

Rapper, Fabolous gets shot in the thigh. Fab who?

Sara Evans blame it all on the nanny!

posted by Michael K Permalink
Dove Cares About Us

Whitney Houston had made it official and filed for divorce from her husband of 14 years, Bobby Brown.

Got Gross?

Even Kimora Man Simmons has a damn "Got Milk" ad. They will give that trash to anybody. I think she takes hormones with her milk, though.


posted by Michael K Permalink
Whitney Houston Keeps Her Promise and Files for Divorce

Whitney Houston had made it official and filed for divorce from her husband of 14 years, Bobby Brown. Her rep confirms that she filed papers in an Orange County, CA court.

She first announced news of divorce last month. She is seeking custody of Bobbi Kristina. Reps for Bobby Brown refuse to comment, because he can't afford a rep!

Whitney is apparently spending her days keeping clean and working on a comeback album while Bobby Brown is partying and avoiding rumors that he's with Karrine "Supahead" Steffans. Karrine denies they are together.

Bobby is also about to start filming another reality show without Whitney. I'm sorry, but Whitney was the reason "Being Bobby Brown" worked and without her, he's got shit. In more ways than one.


posted by Michael K Permalink
The CAPTION THIS CONTEST Winner for October 17th!!!

It's hard out here for a pimp on an allowance - Rough Rider


Paternity Is My Problem. - Tender Cavity

posted by Michael K Permalink
Hot Slut of the Day!

A.J. Benza

For beanpuffmassacre

posted by Michael K Permalink
Birthday Sluts

Zac Efron (19)
Carly Schroeder (17)
Vincent Spano (44)
Wynton Marsalis (45)
Jean-Claude Van Damme (46)
Marina Navratilova (50)
Pam Dawber (55)
Terry McMillan (55)
Dawn Wells (69)
Peter Boyle (71)

posted by Michael K Permalink
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Madge Letter of the Day!

My husband and I began the adoption process many months prior to our trip to Malawi. I did not wish to disclose my intentions to the world prior to the adoption happening as this is a private family matter. After learning that there were over one million orphans in Malawi, it was my wish to open up our home and help one child escape an extreme life of hardship, poverty and in many cases death, as well as expand our family.

Nevertheless, we have gone about the adoption procedure according to the law like anyone else who adopts a child. Reports to the contrary are totally inaccurate. The procedure includes an 18-month evaluation period after which time we hope to make this adoption permanent. This was not a decision or commitment that my family or I take lightly.

I am overwhelmed and inspired by my trip to Malawi and hope that it helps bring attention to how much more the world needs to do to help the children of Africa.

My heartfelt thanks for all the good wishes I have received and I hope the press will allow my family some room for us to experience the joy we feel to have David home.

Madonna Ritchie October 17, 2006 London, England

Somebody shove a cone bra in this cow's mouth.


posted by Michael K Permalink
BREAKING! Victoria Rowell is Missing!

Young and the Restless star, Victoria Rowell was last seen yesterday night The Arts National Art Awards in NYC. She was seated next to Aretha Franklin when she dropped a little meat sauce on her dress. She hasn't been seen since!

Aretha was seen later with a mouthful of weave.

posted by Michael K Permalink
Which Laguna Beach Bitch is Cutting Coke?

One of the Laguna Beach kids posed cutting some lines of coke with her friend. This is Nikki and apparently she's in the new season and is Tyler's sister. I don't really watch the show, but I love seeing teenage pieces of trash get caught.

She's probably going to say that they were just making a cake for their parents and she's cleaning up the flour.

Stupid whore. If you're going to do coke, don't take pictures!